Island Delights: Four Recipes, No Rum

The whole concept of A Little Something is, really, party tidbits. Little bits of food to serve at parties. Little bits of food to soak up some wine or cocktails. Even the picture on the cover has a glass of wine.

So, you'll understand my dismay at the following group of recipes, all of which are clearly missing a vital ingredient:

Rum.

Rum.

Sure, sure, they'll say "add some light rum" but that's hardly how one writes a cocktail recipe. Tell me I'm wrong here.

Island Delights

Relax, sip, and enjoy. Add some light rum or a scoop of vanilla ice cream if you like. These drinks are excellent with nachos, flavored nuts, potato skins, guacamole, black bean dip, chips, and of course, your favorite something.

Makes 1 to 2 servings

Strawberry Banana Colada

1 banana
1/3 cup frozen strawberries
2 tablespoons canned cream of coconut
1/4 cup pineapple juice
1/2 cup ice

Piña Colada

1/4 cup canned cream of coconut
1/2 cup pineapple juice
1/2 cup ice

Island Paradise

1/2 cup frozen sweetened strawberries
2 tablespoons canned cream of coconut
1/4 cup orange juice
1/4 cup pineapple juice
1/2 cup ice

Strawberry Daiquiri

1/2 cup frozen sweetened strawberries
1/4 cup sweet-and-sour mix
1/2 cup ice

Place all ingredients in a blender and blend until smooth. Garnish with fresh fruit slices or wedges if desired.

A daiquiri is not a daiquiri if it doesn't include rum. Okay, purist might well say that a daiquiri isn't a daiquiri unless it's just rum, lime juice, and simple syrup. And coladas aren't coladas when they're just fruit.

Call 'em something else, please. "Island Paradise" is fine by me.

Or, call 'em Frozen Drinks. Some of my friends (Heather & Philip, of Picaroon Blog) used to host a Frozen Drinks Party every summer, where they supplied the booze and everyone brought frozen fruit, ice, and other add-ins. A good time, every year.

Okay, okay. I'll admit it. I don't tend to do frozen, blended cocktails. I like my margaritas on the rocks. I like my daiquiris in theory. But I'm being crotchety, and A Little Something has let me down on this group of recipes.

Henceforth, I'm going to pretend that these are Frozen Drinks, or Mocktails, or Fancy Drinks For Baby Showers And Children's Parties. I'm an information architect; labels are important. With the right label, I'll stop this recipe rant.

Chocolate Truffles with Kahlua and Pecans: This Is a Keeper

We've been savory for far too long here on Take One Cookbook... (Yes, I'm conveniently forgetting the week of Jell-O.) It's time for something decadent, something sweet from A Little Something to help you roll into the holiday weekend.

And, really, when you're looking for decadent and sweet, nothing fits the bill quite so nicely as a boozy homemade truffle. They are really, really, really easy to make, but you don't have to let anyone know that. Just like in that old Rice Krispies commercial where the mom makes a big deal about making rice cereal marshmallow treats and the family believes that they were the hardest thing to make in the world, the ultimate expression of maternal love.

No offense meant to said marshmallow cereal squares -- they really are darned tasty. Heck, I had an R.A. back at American University who was completely mystified by my ability to crank out Rice Krispie Treats.

He'd be gobsmacked by today's recipe -- you, too, can leave people dumbfounded.

Chocolate Truffles with Kalua and Pecans

These elegant chocolates are a perfect accompaniment to your favorite coffee or espresso. 

Makes 25

3/4 cup whipping cream
1 1/2 cups (12 ounces) semisweet chocolate bars, finely chopped
2 tablespoons Kahlua
1 1/4 cups finely chopped pecans

1. Line an 8-inch-square baking pan with foil. Set aside.
2. Bring the cream to a simmer, remove from the heat, and whisk in the chocolate until smooth and melted.
3. Whisk in the Kahlua. Pour the mixture into the prepared pan and freeze about 30 minutes, until just firm.
4. Cut the chocolate into 25 squares. Pour the nuts into a small bowl. Coat each square with nuts and roll into a ball.
5. Place the chocolates on a small baking sheet and chill until firm, at least 2 hours. Serve cold.

Try some of these combinations:

• Substitute Grand Marnier for the Kahlua.

• Substitute almonds or hazelnuts for the pecans.

If you made up a batch of kaluha a few weeks back, you can certainly use it here.

You also don't have to step near the stove. Really! Heat up that cream in the microwave, and you'll have an easier time all around. Don't even think of touching a double boiler.

If you're sharing these with people who might have nut allergies, for the love of all things, do not put nuts in your truffles. You can replace the nuts with crushed vanilla wafers, or even some puffed rice cereal. If you go the Krispie route, I'd recommend melting up some more chocolate in the microwave so that you can coat the truffles and make them extra pretty.

Seasons Change: Hot Buttered Rum

Today's recipe might seem like a strange choice for the middle of August. But here's the thing: the seasons are changing. Sunset is at 8 PM here in DC, and won't be this late again until April. April! We are officially getting closer to the time when I won't have to say "well, it does have ice cream in it, so that's kind of summery..." to justify this Favorite Recipes from Caldwell, Idaho recipe.

Hot Buttered Rum
Dave Keuneman

Batter:
1 qt. vanilla ice cream
1 lb. brown sugar
1 lb. soft butter

Cream together. Keep refrigerated.

Drink (per cup):
2 heaping tsp. batter
1 oz. rum
6 oz. boiling water

Aaaaaah, hot buttered. The ice cream is a relatively recent addition to the hot buttered arsenal, but I'll tell you -- it's a great addition. If you're mixing this up the day you're going to use it, then the fridge is fine, but otherwise, store this in the freezer. The sugar and butter will help keep the ice cream soft enough to scoop out a big ol' spoonful when you feel a hankering for a hot buttered.

Yes, hot buttered, full stop. As a not-at-all-legal-to-drink kid, I loved a mug of hot buttered...water. It's really quite tasty. It's warm, and milky, and sweet, and spicy.

Spicy. Because of the spices. You know, those spices Mr. Keuneman left out of the recipe. You have two options here: You can use spiced rum with this unspiced batter, or you can add in, say, a tablespoon of cinnamon and a teaspoon or two of nutmeg. There is a third option, come to think of it: spice up the batter and used spiced rum.

Dave is one of only two men who have recipes in Favorite Recipes from Caldwell, Idaho -- Mike Neher has a duck with sauerkraut recipe that also has me yearning for wool-wearing weather. (Simple, really. Basically, it's "stuff a duck with a jar of kraut, and roast it.")

I suggest you make up a double batch of the hot buttered batter, and divvy it up into several quasi-disposable plastic food storage containers (oh, fine...I mean GladWare) and have them on hand for hostess gifts, cookie exchanges, neighbors who shoveled your walk for you, and so forth. It's a great thing to have, it's a great thing to share.

As much as I like making this myself, the best hot buttered rum in the world is at the Clapp Family 23rd Party, an annual caroling party back in my home town. Great people. Great pot luck. Fabulous singing. And a never-ending supply of hot buttered.

Homemade Hootch: Grape Wine

Yesterday, we talked about infusing cheap vodka to make more upscale booze, and, boy, did y'all come running. So, today, we'll look at another DIY hootch recipe from Favorite Recipes from Caldwell, Idaho:

Grape Wine

24 oz. frozen grape juice (undiluted)
1/4 cake soft yeast
4 c. sugar

Stir together with water to fill 1 gallon jug. Place a balloon on the mouth of gallon jug. Let mixture stand in a dark place 3-4 weeks.

What, none of the fine Caldwell Jay-C-Ettes wanted to put her name on Grape Wine? Tsk.

The balloon is your fermentation lock; it lets gas build-up out without letting bacteria in. Other sources for more, shall we say, complicated brewing methods, recommend pricking the balloon with a pin a few times. If the balloon starts swelling and you're worried, disinfect a pin and gently poke. Why not?

Let's talk yeast. It's a pretty safe assumption that they're calling for a 2 oz. cake. Fresh yeast can be a bit hard to find. Fret not: you can substitute other yeasts. Use one package of active dry yeast or instant yeast. It's not a perfect substitute, portion-wise, as it's more like 1/3 of a yeast cake, but you'll be okay.

This is not going to be nuanced -- you're using grape juice from the freezer case, after all. That being said, use quality ingredients, and meticulously clean vessels, and you'll have something drinkable, and the method is a lot less scary than making kvass.

Coffee Liquor: Kaluha

Cheap vodka is cheap vodka, but cheap vodka artfully and easily infused with other stuff is sublime. Sometimes, it even resembles Things With Brand Names. Favorite Recipes from Caldwell, Idaho has a great Thing That Resembles A Thing With A Brand Name, and a near-miss spelling that winks at indiscretion.

Kaluha
Darlene Perry

Boil 2 cups sugar and 1 cup water for 5 minutes. Remove from heat. Dissolve 6 teaspoons Yuban instant coffee, 2 teaspoons vanilla. Then add to sugar water. After it has cooled for a while, add a fifth of vokda (any kind) and 2 teaspoons of glycerin (buy at drug store). Mix well. Pour in half-gallon jar and drink, drink, drink and be merry.

Oh, Darlene Perry. You're our kind of people (not to mention our kind of recipe writer/digressor). I love the brand specificity of the instant coffee. Apparently, they still make Yuban though I'm much more likely to stock Starbucks VIA
in my pantry. I should clarify here -- I love that the only brand specificity here is for the Yuban. The vodka is rail, and the drink, well...the drink can't spell.

I've had this. I've made this. This is tasty. Great in coffee or cocoa, great mixed into milk, great poured over ice cream, great on the rocks. Easy to make, cheap, and tasty. If you're a-okay with alcohol, give this one a try.

[E.T.A.: You can order glycerine through Amazon (and, I'm assuming, other online vendors) these days. Why do you want it in your liquor? It rounds out the mouth feel and takes off any harsh edges to your cheap booze).]


Biographical note time: I will have to check with Aunt Robbi, but I'm betting that Darlene Perry is really Joy Darlene Willmorth Perry, who died in 2008. This is from her obituary:

In 1983, she changed careers and became the Children's Librarian at Caldwell Public Library. Her next 15 years at the Library were the happiest of her working life. She retired from the library in 1998, but never ceased to think of libraries, especially Caldwell's, as magical places. This love of libraries and books has been passed on to her children and grandchildren.

Joy was an avid reader. Any conversation with her would inevitably include the question, "Read anything good lately?"

Yes, yes we have. And, if the Kaluha Ms. Perry is the Library Ms. Perry, well, then...I met her. I know that library; Aunt Robbi worked there. And, frankly, if I were running the summer reading program at the Caldwell Public Library in the mid-80s, I might be coming up with some nice concoctions to mark the end of a long, hard day, too. (The summer reading program is going on right now, folks -- there's still time.) If there is or was another Darlene Perry in Caldwell, with ties to my aunt, I'd love to give proper attribution -- but I'm not sorry I found out about Joy. I must have spoken with her several times, but now I know something about her.

Drink, drink, drink and be merry.

PUNCH!!!! No, Seriously. Punch. With Actual Booze.

Presbyterian Palate Pleasers has a metric buttload of punches.

Well... it SAYS it does. It has shockingly few punches with any punch. Thank God the Presbyterians give us at least one punch with some booze in it.

Punch

1 qt. ginger ale
1 can Hawaiian Punch
1 box frozen strawberries
Whiskey (optional)
1 pt. orange sherbet
1 pt. pineapple sherbet

Mix all of the above ingredients, add ice cubes to make cold. Foat orange and lemon slices on top. Serves 12 to 15.

Joyce Stephens

Bless Ms. Stephens's heart, but...no.

First off, for a proper punch, the booze is not optional. I'll admit that the last time I made a punch, it was 2 gallons or more of non-alcoholic beverage, but... it lacked booze, so it wasn't a proper punch.

We of Take One Cookbook... never think that cheese is optional, that bacon is optional, or that booze is optional.

We trust you love us anyway.

Let's look at this and realize this is making 12 servings that are really, really, really small. Like, teacup size, not even coffee mug size. Certainly not Solo cup sized, and when was the last time you were at a punch-worthy occasion that called for less than Solo cup sized servings of anything?

I've never made a sherbet/HawaiianPunch/soda punch with whiskey. I tend to use cheap bubbly. Prosecco, American "champagne," whatever is less than $13 and has bubbles and booze in it.

But, really, let's again look at that size... This is not enough punch for real people. Here's how I'd do it:

4 liters ginger ale or other clear soda
2 liters of Hawaiian Punch or other fruit punch (not a can of concentrate)
1/2 gallon of rainbow sherbet
1-2 bottles inexpensive toasty/yeasty fizzy booze

Plop sherbet in large (I mean LARGE) vessel. Pour non-fizzy liquid over top. Pour non-alcoholic fizzy stuff over top. Pour fizzy booze over top. Serve.

Wendy A F G Stengel

This punch will do sans alcohol if you have a baby shower and a pregnant woman lurking. It does taste good virginized.

But the boozy bubbles make a punch.

Trust me.

A Frugal Tipple: Blackberry Wine

When Depression looms, the prudent householder cuts back on frivolities. This does not, however, mean going without life's little necessities. You know, like booze. Depression Era Recipes gives several recipes for frugal tipples, including this one that seems a bit oddly placed, coming the day after Michaelmas.

Blackberry Wine

1 gal. black berries
1 qt. boiling water
2 lbs. sugar

Bruise berries, add boiling water. Let stand 24 hours, stirring occasionally. Strain off the liquor and put into a cask. Add sugar; cork tight and let stand till next October, when it will be ready for use. It may be bottled.

So, assuming you picked your berries before the Devil spit on them yesterday, this is a great way to use 'em up!

In my family, berries tend to end up more than a little boozy on a regular basis. We don't have the patience to wait a full year for the results, though. Instead, we put clean berries in sterile jars, and cover them with vodka or some other strong spirit, and let 'em marinate for several weeks. Strain and add simple syrup to taste. Mmmmm.

Favorite uses for blackberry wine: mixing with less than stellar merlot. Yes, really. Also great mixed with mead.